How to Grow Old
In spite of the title, this article will really be on how not to grow old, which, at my time of life, is a much more important subject. My first advice would be to choose your ancestors carefully. Although both my parents died young, I have done well in this respect as regards my other ancestors. My maternal grandfather, it is true, was cut off in the flower of his youth at the age of sixty-seven, but my other three grandparents all lived to be over eighty. Of remoter ancestors I can only discover one who did not live to a great age, and he died of a disease which is now rare, namely, having his head cut off. A great-grandmother of mine, who was a friend of Gibbon, lived to the age of ninety-two, and to her last day remained a terror to all her descendants. My maternal grandmother, after having nine children who survived, one who died in infancy, and many miscarriages, as soon as she became a widow devoted herself to women's higher education. She was one of the founders of Girton College, and worked hard at opening the medical profession to women. She used to relate how she met in Italy an elderly gentleman who was looking very sad. She inquired the cause of his melancholy and he said that he had just parted from his two grandchildren.  "Good gracious," she exclaimed, "I have seventy-two grandchildren, and if I were sad each time I parted from one of them, I should have a dismal existence!" "Madre snaturale," he replied. But speaking as one of the seventy-two, I prefer her recipe. After the age of eighty she found she had some difficulty in getting to sleep, so she habitually spent the hours from midnight to 3 a. m. in reading popular science. I do not believe that she ever had time to notice that she was growing old. This, I think, is the proper recipe for remaining young. If you have wide and keen interests and activities in which you can still be effective, you will have no reason to think about the merely statistical fact of the number of years you have already lived, still less of the probable brevity of your future.
As regards health, I have nothing useful to say since I have little experience of illness. I eat and drink whatever I like, and sleep when I can not keep awake. I never do anything whatever on the ground that it is good for health, though in actual fact the things I like doing are mostly wholesome.
Psychologically there are two dangers to be guarded against in old age. One of these is undue absorption in the past. It does not do to live in memories, in regrets for the good old days, or in sadness about friends who are dead. One's thoughts must be directed to the future, and to things about which there is something to be done. This is not always easy; one’s own past is a gradually increasing weight. It is easy to think to oneself that one's emotions used to be more vivid than they are, and one's mind more keen. If this is true it should be forgotten, and if it is forgotten it will probably not be true.
The other thing to be avoided is clinging to youths in the hope of sucking vigor from its vitality. When your children are grown up they want to live their own lives, and if you continue to be as interested in them as you were when they were young, you are likely to become a burden to them, unless they are unusually odious. I do not mean that one should be without interest in then, but one's interest should be contemplative and, if possible, philanthropic, but not unduly emotional. Animals become indifferent to their young as soon as their young can look after themselves, but human beings, owing to the length of infancy, find this difficult.
I think that a successful old age is easiest for those who have strong impersonal interests involving appropriate activities. It is in this sphere that long experience is really fruitful, and it is in this sphere that the wisdom barn of experience can be exercised without being oppressive. It is no use telling grown-up children not to make mistakes, both because they will not believe you, and because mistakes are an essential part of education. But if you are one of those who are incapable of impersonal interests, you nay find that your life will be empty unless you concern yourself with your children and grandchildren. In that case you must realize that while you can still render them material services, such as making them an allowance or knitting them jumpers, you must not expect that they will enjoy your company.
Some old people are oppressed by the fear of death. In the young there is a justification for this feeling. Young men who have reason to fear that they will be killed in battle may justifiably feel bitter in the thought that they have been cheated of the best things that life has to offer. But in an old man who has known human joys and sorrows, and has achieved whatever work it was in him to do, the fear of death is somewhat abject and ignoble. The best way to overcome it-so at least it seems to me-is to make your interests gradually wider and more impersonal, until bit by bit the walls of the ego recede, and your life becomes increasingly merged in the universal life. An individual human existence should be like a river-small at first, narrowly contained within its banks, and rushing passionately past rocks and over waterfalls. Gradually the river grows wider, the banks recede, the eaters flow more quietly, and in the end, without any visible break, they become merged in the sea, and painlessly lose their individual being. The man who, in old age, can see his life in this way, will not suffer firm the fear of death, since the things he cares for will continue. And if, with the decay of vitality, weariness increases, the thought of rest will not be unwelcome. I should wish to die while still at work, knowing that others will carry on what I can no longer do, and content in the thought that what was possible has been done.
            论老之将至
    尽管有这样一个标题，这篇文章真正要谈的却是怎样才能不变老。在我这个年纪，这实在是一个至关重要的间题。我的第一个忠告是，要仔细选择你的祖先。尽管我的双亲皆属早逝，但是考虑到我的其他祖先，我的选择还是很不错的。是的，我的外祖父67岁时去世，正值盛年，可是另外三位祖父辈的亲人都活到80岁以上。至于稍远些的亲戚，我只发现一位没能长寿的，他死于一种现已罕见的病症：掉脑袋。我的一位曾祖母是吉本的朋友，她活到92岁高龄，她一直到死都始终是让子孙们全都感到敬畏的人。我的外祖母，一辈子生了十个孩子，活了九个，一个夭折，此外还有过多次流产。可是守寡之后，她马上就致力于妇女的高等教育事业。她是格顿学院的创办人之一，她力图使妇女进人医疗行业。她总好讲起她在意大利遇到过的一位面容悲哀的老年绅士。她询问他忧郁的缘故，他说他刚刚同两个孙儿女分手。“天哪!”她叫道，“我有72个孙儿孙女，如果我每次分手就要悲伤不止，那我就没法活了!”“不寻常的母亲。”他同答说。但是，作为她的72个孙儿孙女的一员，我却要说我更喜欢她的见地。上了80岁，她开始感到有些难于人睡，她便经常在午夜时分至凌展三时这段时间里阅读科普方面的书籍。我想她根本就没有工夫去留意她在衰老。我认为，这就是保持年轻的最佳方法。如果你的兴趣和活动既广泛又热烈，而且你又能从中感到自己仍然精力旺盛，那么你就不必去考虑你已经活了多少年这种纯粹的统计学情况，更不必去考虑你那也许不很长久的未来。
   
至于健康，由于我这一生几乎从未患过病，也就没有什么有益的忠告。我吃喝皆随心所欲，醒不了的时候就睡觉。我做事情从不以它是否有益健康为根据，尽管实际上我喜欢做的事情通常是有益健康的。
从心理角度讲，老年需防备两种危险。一是过分沉湎于往事。人不能生活在回忆当中，不能生活在对美好往昔的怀念或对过世的友人的哀念之中。一个人应当把心思放在未来，放到需要自己去做点什么的事情上。要做到这一点并非轻而易举，往事的影响总是在不断地增加。人们总好认为自己过去的情感要比现在强烈得多，头脑也比现在敏锐。假如真的如此，就该忘掉它；而如果可以忘掉它，那你所认为的情况就可能并不是真的。be about to
另一件应当避免的事是依恋年轻人，期望从他们的勃勃生气中获取力量。子女们长大成人之后，都想按照自己的意愿生活。如果你还像他们年幼时那样关心他们，你就会成为他们的包袱，除丰他们是异常迟钝的人。我不是说不应该关心子女，而是说这种关心应该是含蓄的，假如可能的话，还应是宽厚的，而不应该过分地感情用事。动物的幼崽一且自立，成年的动物就不再关心它们了。人类则因其幼年时期较长而难于做到这一点。
我认为，对于那些具有强烈的不受个人好恶所影响的喜好、其活动又都恰当适宜的人们，成功地度过老年绝非难事。只有在这个范围里，长年的经历才真正有益;只有在这个范围里，源于经验的智慧才能得到运用而不使别人感到压抑。告诫己经成人的孩子别犯错误是没有用处的，因为一来他们不会相信你，二来错误原本就是教育所必不可少的一部分。但是，如果你是那种受个人情感支配的人，你就会发现，不把心思都放在子女和孙儿女身上，你就会觉得生活空虚。假如事实确是如此，那么你必须明白，虽然你还能为他们提供物质上的帮助，比如给他们一笔零花钱或者为他们编织毛线外套的时候，绝不要期望他们会喜欢你的陪伴。
有些老人因害怕死亡而苦恼。年轻人害怕死亡是可以理解的。那些担心会在战斗中丧生的年轻人一想到会失去生活能够给予的种种美好事物，就感到痛苦。这种担心并不是无缘无故的，也是情有可原的。但是，对于一位经历了人世的悲欢、屐行了个人职责的老人，害怕死亡就有些可怜且可耻了。克服这种恐惧的最好办法是—至少我是这样看的—逐渐扩大你的兴趣范围并使其不受个人情感的影响，直至包围自我的围墙一点一点地离开你，而你的生活则越来越融合于大家的生活之中。每一个个人的存在都应该像一条河一样—开始是细小的，被限制在狭窄的两岸之间，充满激情地冲过巨石，滑下瀑布。渐渐地，河道变宽了，河岸扩展了，河水流得更平稳了。最后，没有明显的间断，河水流入了海洋，毫无痛苦地摆脱了自身的存在。一个在年老时能够这样理解自己的一生的人，将不会因害怕死亡而痛苦，因为他所珍爱的一切都将继续存在下去。而且，如果随着精力的衰退，疲倦之感日渐增加，长眠并非是不受欢迎的念头。我渴望死于尚能劳作之时，同时知道他人将继续我所未竟的事业，我大可因为已经尽了自己之所能而感到安慰。

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